“Working with a Divorce Coach can be crucial to your success in mediation, saving you time and many £1000’s.”
This may be your first separation and divorce and everything feels very unfamiliar, as you try to get to grips with all the massive changes going on in life.
As well as the emotional upheaval, you may be worried about making mistakes, not knowing where to go or who to see for support, information and advice.
You may be feeling isolated, concerned about your future and powerless, in so many ways.
Many people would not think twice about consulting and working with a Coach as they embark on a challenging event, whether this is a sporting or business challenge.
So, why should it be any different for the family mediation process which can be equally challenging, as you navigate the practical, physical, emotional and psychological challenges of divorce and separation.
Divorce Coaches are qualified and experienced to support and guide you through your separation divorce journey, working with you alongside the mediation process, as part of your mediation support team, helping you to make the best possible decisions for your future, at every stage.
They are a central figure in your ‘Support Circle’, supporting you through each of the 6 stages of the mediation process which begins with creating a coaching relationship with you built on absolute trust and confidence, forming the foundation of your work together.
If you are using this Divorce Manual your Coach will guide you through it, helping you to use and apply the information, referring you to other experts and helping you to work with them, as part of a cohesive separation and divorce mediation team, as and when required.
We call this process ‘Mediation Teaming’ and refer to it in section 1, chapter 6 about how to work with your solicitor as part of your mediation support team.
(‘Mediation Teaming’- See section 1, chapter 6- Solicitor supported mediation)
Your Coach will help you to develop and use strategies and skills to maximise the chances of achieving outcomes in mediation with your former partner which meet as many value-based priorities (needs and interests) as possible (‘successful outcomes’) whether these relate to financial or child-centred outcomes.
In this chapter we focus on 4 key areas of Coaching support:
- Divorce
The no-fault divorce process is covered in depth in chapter 7- How to do your own divorce.
The Coach can offer additional help and support with the online divorce process helping you to achieve a no-fault divorce in a focused, collaborative, cost effective way with your former partner.
- Personal/Relationship
The Divorce Manual offers various guidance and sources of information to help you communicate better with your former partner, dedicating the whole of chapter 4 to the subject of preparing to communicate with your former partner in mediation.
Your Coach can provide you with essential additional support with this, helping you to present your ‘best selves’ in the relationship to prepare for and succeed in challenging conversations and situations, so that you can make important joint decisions and reach successful outcomes together.
- Finances
Chapters 8- 12 of the Divorce Manual provide you with most of the information documents you need to reach a fair financial settlement for yourselves whether you situation involves businesses and/or pensions.
Your Coach can provide you with vital additional support and confidence, helping you to complete forms, understand information and work with other professionals, as you work successfully through every stage of the financial mediation process, making important joint decisions and reaching successful financial outcomes together.
- Parents and children
Chapters 13,14 and 15 provide you with a wealth of information, guidance and documents when it comes to working with the other parent in mediation to co-create Parent Plans and sort out child arrangements.
Again, it can make all the difference to work with your Coach, as you navigate the challenging world of separation and co-parenting, working with the other parent (and other child and parenting experts) in and outside mediation.
We do not underestimate how confused and anxious you may be feeling at the start of your separation, about all sorts of things so, if it helps, please arrange to speak to a Divorce Coach. Many of them offer a first free meeting, referred to as a Discovery meeting.