During the MIAM the mediator will, among other things explain what happens in a mediation session and how it all works, how much it costs (whether you are eligible for legal aid), listen and check that they understand your narrative, check that mediation would be safe for you and your former partner, check for child safety issues, answer your questions, provide you with information you may be needing at this stage, recommend other professionals and organisation you might benefit from using and provide you with some clear options and pathway.
The mediator may well have asked you to complete some documents before the MIAM such as a client form or questionnaire to help you and the mediator make the most out of the meeting. Have a look at our resources section to this chapter.
It is the mediator’s duty to form a view about whether Mediation is suitable for you and your circumstances.
It will also be for you to decide whether you are willing to proceed with mediation since the process is and must be voluntary (one of the pillar principles of mediation)
The key aim will be for you to feel sufficiently well informed and confident before making the very important decision about whether or not to try mediation. You may need time after the MIAM to reflect on your discussions with the mediator and choices open to you, before you decide.
Essentially, the mediator will explore with each of you separately and confidentially whether it is likely to be possible, and how to best prepare you both, to work together in mediation (either in the same room or separate rooms) to resolve the issues you both raise and help you to avoid court.
Part of this assessment process involves questions relating to the safety of mediation since the mediator must feel that they can create and offer you a process and space within which to talk which is and feels secure and safe enough from yours and your former partner’s perspectives.
Also, during this assessment process the mediator, will among other things, identify areas in which you may require support whether this relates to communication or information you may require, for example. The mediator may, for example talk to you about the possibility of using a divorce coach to support you through the mediation process.
The mediator will explore your narrative with you in depth including your perspectives, priorities and concerns you may have, checking with you that they have understood these. Knowing that the mediator has understood your point of view and feelings on matters of importance to you will be crucial to the success of the mediation process.
The mediator will complete a legal aid eligibility form with you to find out whether you are entitled to free mediation (Legal Aid) to cover this meeting and future mediation sessions, which would also give you a few free hours with your solicitor if they hold a legal aid contract with the Government, to support you, if mediation proceeds.
At the time of writing this section, the Government is also offering a £500 Voucher scheme which is not means tested, where your mediation involves a dispute about your children.
The process might be slightly different where the MIAM is being carried out online so please check with your mediators.
To enable the mediator to complete the legal aid form you MUST provide all the financial evidence set out in the legal aid document checklist relevant to your employment status, which you will find on the webpage in support of this chapter. If you do not do so the mediator cannot assess whether you are eligible for free mediation and will have to charge you for the MIAM. If you do not qualify for Legal Aid for family mediation, the Mediator will explain to you on the phone before your meeting, how much the MIAM will cost and ask for payment for this at the end of the MIAM.